ok, so i have FABULOUS news: i've saved SO MUCH MONEY in the past week! wahoo!!!!! first of all, click here for a free sample of ob tampons, and click here for a $1.50 off coupon as well. ok, so that aside, now let me let of my adventures at cvs. . .
my friends have been telling me that i should really get into couponing and cvs's ecb deals, but i wasn't sure and neither was jon. well, i decided to give it a try and here's what i ended up getting and how much i paid for it all:
7.24.08 i made 3 trips to the register--
1) 5 glade scented oil candle refills, 2 coupons for said candles ($2 off 2 and $3 off 3), and 2 boxes of 135-count kotex pantiliners. i paid $20.09 and got $7 in ecb's
2) 2 cvs brand 375-count cotton swabs, 2 cvs brand baby lotion, 2 cvs brand baby oil, and 2 cvs brand baby shampoo. used $7 ecb's from previous purchase. paid $7.49 and got $5 ecb.
3) 3 bottles clean & clear morning burst facial cleanser. used $5 ebs from previous purchase. paid $13.88 and got $5 ecb's
7.25.08 i made 4 trips to the register--
1) 3 l'oreal vive pro hydra gloss shampoo, 3 l'oreal vive pro hyrda gloss conditioner, 3 buy 1, get 1 free coupons for shampoo and conditioners (plus they were one sale for b1g1, so they were all free), 2-pack crest w/ scope toothpaste. i paid $6.92 and got $2 ecb's
2) 2 cvs 22-count pantiliners. used $2 ecb's, paid nothing, got $2 ecb's
3) 2 blade 12 oz. body wash. used $2 ecb's from previous purchase, plus $5 ecb's from yesterday's last purchase. paid $1.07 and got $2 ecb's
4) 2 crayola 24-count crayons (on sale as b1g1). used $2 ecb's from previous purchase. paid $0.31
i added it all up and here's what i came up w/: i spent a total of $49.76 on $129.15 worth of stuff. that means i saved $79.39 or 61.47%! it's like christmas only better b/c it doesn't cost as much! :)
here's my haul--
i'm way excited too b/c later today i'm gonna go dumster diving at the recycling center w/ some friends to get massive stacks of coupons for when i go grocery shopping on thursday. happy evelyn! :)
follow our adventures in homeschooling, teaching our kids about christ, and trying all kinds of new things, from cooking and baking to science experiments to going new places. we embrace every day to the fullest so we can learn about the world around us, giving and receiving the best life has to offer!
Monday, July 28, 2008
Saturday, July 26, 2008
bumGenius
ok, so we decided to make the switch to cloth diapers to help save money and so far, i LOVE it! they're so cute w/ the colors, he almost doesn't even need to wear pants! :) here's the 411--
we ordered 3 dozen bumGenius 3.0 all-in-one one-size diapers from palmetto diaper works on 6.17.08. we waited and waited forever it seemed and they FINALLY came in on 7.22.08. almost 6 weeks! when i got home from picking them up, i realized we'd only gotten 22 of the 36 we ordered, so i called to let her know. she got back to me TWO DAYS later to tell me she'd have them in 5-10 business days. um, 2 more weeks? i don't think so. i asked for a refund, but so far i haven't seen it. that same day (7.24.08), we ordered the remaining 14 diapers from cotton babies and paid the same prices we'd have paid from the first place, but they'll be here on tuesday. so what i don't get is why it's gonna take 2 weeks to get them from the first place, but less than 1 week from the second? anyways, i called the first place to ask where my refund is, but i got her voicemail and i haven't heard back from her yet. we're getting really mad about the whole thing. really, how hard is it to give someone what they paid for? and honestly, i picked it up from her, so she didn't even have to pay shipping! i swear, some people are so irresponsible. . .
ok, so that's the end of my vent, on to the good parts of cloth diapering. first of all, it'll save money in the long run. it cost a little over $600 for 3 dozen diapers, which is more than we probably need, but at least we won't run out. they're every bit as easy as disposables, you just add the step of washing them. yeah, you have to get the poo off and into the toilet but TECHNICALLY you're supposed to do that w/ 'sposies too. . . the only nice thing about the diapers taking so long to get to us is that she gave us one of those diaper sprayers that hooks up to the toilet for free. they normally retail for $40 or so. . . so that makes the poo spraying alot easier and less messy and time-consuming.
we've also switched to cloth wipes, which is infinitely easier than i'd expected. we had a bunch of baby washcloths that were given to us, but i hadn't used since trevor was about a month old, so we use those. them you just make the soap solution which is super easy. the cool thing about this is that you can make your own disposable wipes this way too. just get a roll of viva paper towels and cut it in half w/ an electric knife. pour the solution over it while it's still warm (not boiling though) and pull out the cardboard roll. then you just pull them up from the middle! pretty smart, huh? well, i don't remember where i heard that tip, but i didn't come up w/ it on my own. . . it was the same place i got the "recipe" for the soap solution.
anyways, here are a couple of pictures of trevor looking stinkin' cute in his new COLORFUL diapers--
we ordered 3 dozen bumGenius 3.0 all-in-one one-size diapers from palmetto diaper works on 6.17.08. we waited and waited forever it seemed and they FINALLY came in on 7.22.08. almost 6 weeks! when i got home from picking them up, i realized we'd only gotten 22 of the 36 we ordered, so i called to let her know. she got back to me TWO DAYS later to tell me she'd have them in 5-10 business days. um, 2 more weeks? i don't think so. i asked for a refund, but so far i haven't seen it. that same day (7.24.08), we ordered the remaining 14 diapers from cotton babies and paid the same prices we'd have paid from the first place, but they'll be here on tuesday. so what i don't get is why it's gonna take 2 weeks to get them from the first place, but less than 1 week from the second? anyways, i called the first place to ask where my refund is, but i got her voicemail and i haven't heard back from her yet. we're getting really mad about the whole thing. really, how hard is it to give someone what they paid for? and honestly, i picked it up from her, so she didn't even have to pay shipping! i swear, some people are so irresponsible. . .
ok, so that's the end of my vent, on to the good parts of cloth diapering. first of all, it'll save money in the long run. it cost a little over $600 for 3 dozen diapers, which is more than we probably need, but at least we won't run out. they're every bit as easy as disposables, you just add the step of washing them. yeah, you have to get the poo off and into the toilet but TECHNICALLY you're supposed to do that w/ 'sposies too. . . the only nice thing about the diapers taking so long to get to us is that she gave us one of those diaper sprayers that hooks up to the toilet for free. they normally retail for $40 or so. . . so that makes the poo spraying alot easier and less messy and time-consuming.
we've also switched to cloth wipes, which is infinitely easier than i'd expected. we had a bunch of baby washcloths that were given to us, but i hadn't used since trevor was about a month old, so we use those. them you just make the soap solution which is super easy. the cool thing about this is that you can make your own disposable wipes this way too. just get a roll of viva paper towels and cut it in half w/ an electric knife. pour the solution over it while it's still warm (not boiling though) and pull out the cardboard roll. then you just pull them up from the middle! pretty smart, huh? well, i don't remember where i heard that tip, but i didn't come up w/ it on my own. . . it was the same place i got the "recipe" for the soap solution.
anyways, here are a couple of pictures of trevor looking stinkin' cute in his new COLORFUL diapers--
Thursday, June 19, 2008
puppy!
so, we got a dog, happy day! we named him toby, and he's adorable! he's a 4 month old black and white cockapoo. he loves to run around and play, and will even play fetch. . . well, sort of. he'll run and get whatever you throw, but he doesn't bring it back. . . we're working on house breaking him, which is frustrating, but i think it's going well. he's crate trained, so he stays in there at night and when we're not around. if he goes on the floor, he goes in as well. today was the longest he'd ever been out, but he peed AND pooped on the floor, so in he went again! poor dog, but he's gotta learn somehow. up till his accident though, he'd been out of the crate for about 2 hours. he was a happy puppy, that's for sure. i just need to figure out his signal for needing to go out (if there even IS one yet), i think that'll help alot. till then, we'll just keep doing what we're doing. . .
i'm a little nervous about letting him run around the house mostly b/c he had fleas when we first got him home and i haven't had a chance to check and see if the treatment we put on him worked. i don't want him getting fleas in our carpets or furniture, so until i know that it's working, he'll be staying away from the softer surfaces. . .
anyways, here's some pictures of him; the first one is when he was getting a bath to help kill the fleas--
no more pictures! silly puppy--
he's totally cute and really fun, and i'm sure that once he's housebroken and all the fleas are gone, we'll get to enjoy him even more! :)
i'm a little nervous about letting him run around the house mostly b/c he had fleas when we first got him home and i haven't had a chance to check and see if the treatment we put on him worked. i don't want him getting fleas in our carpets or furniture, so until i know that it's working, he'll be staying away from the softer surfaces. . .
anyways, here's some pictures of him; the first one is when he was getting a bath to help kill the fleas--
no more pictures! silly puppy--
he's totally cute and really fun, and i'm sure that once he's housebroken and all the fleas are gone, we'll get to enjoy him even more! :)
trevor's birthday
ok, so it's been a while since i wrote, but things have been a little crazy. jon's been studying so he can test for staff, so he's been using the computer alot for that, as well as reviewing stuff for work since he had a 4 month break from his actual job. . .
trevor's first birthday was 2 weeks ago! he got a pool from us, which he got to play in while jon was at work that day--


trevor's first birthday was 2 weeks ago! he got a pool from us, which he got to play in while jon was at work that day--
we celebrated in the evening by inviting another family over for dinner and cake. we had chicken tacos, then opened presents (the one in the picture is from his grandma r.)--
after that, we had funfetti cake. trevor had a good time w/ it - fortunately, i made him a cupcake w/out icing so it would be a little less mess to clean up!
so after everyone left, trevor needed a bath. well, he decided to give me a present as well - he pooped in the tub! ugh! jon laughed about it, but whatever. i guess that was trevor's way of telling me i need to clean the bathroom more often! :P
Thursday, May 22, 2008
the fiascos and awesomeness of having jon home again!
so trevor and i went to the airport to meet jon. i put this sign on trevor's stroller--
and this one on the house (and yeah, i painted them both, go me!)--
oh, and i decided to save the dress for a date, so instead i wore the other outfit i posted a week ago (the one that had the white shirt w/ black circles all over it)
i still think i looked FIERCE (to quote stacy and clinton), if i do say so myself! jon was appreciative. . .
so when we got home, we unloaded trevor and jon's suitcases and came in the house.
ok, sidenote for a sec: i cleaned the WHOLE HOUSE yesterday. this is extremely rare, my actually getting off my lazy butt to clean. i don't remember the last time i cleaned, but i know jon helped. . . and he was gone a little over 4 months. ew, gross, i know. ok, i DID mop the floor about a month ago. . . but that's it. so yeah, i was pretty proud of having cleaned everything up and making the house look all pretty and shiny like a mr. clean commercial. the REASON i never clean is only partly b/c i'm lazy (i am, i admit it). . . the bigger reason is that EVERY SINGLE TIME i clean, jon tracks in all kinds of dirt and goo and messes it up. like, it'll rain and he'll have mud on his boots, but refuses to take them off. . . it NEVER happens if it's been a while since i cleaned, just the days that i actually try.
so i figured it's supposed to be nice weather, jon won't be wearing his boots, i'm safe. so what's the FIRST thing that happens when jon walks in the house? the wheel on one of his suitcases BREAKS and he leaves a HUGE BLACK STREAK going down the length of the hallway (gotta love military housing's lovely industrial tile floors). . . i saw it and i was like "you did NOT just do that!" then i made him clean it. . . it took like, 2 seconds w/ a magic eraser, but still. . . of course, now i have this really bright white streak in the midst of slightly-less-white tiles in my hallway, so it seems i didn't do as good a job w/ the cleaning as i'd thought. . .
ok, so i put trevor down for a nap, jon and i *ahem* reacquaint ourselves a bit, and after lunch, we decide to all 3 go on a walk. we leave the house only to find that we left the trunk and 1 of the car doors open. . . good job guys, way to be on the ball. . . yeah, apparently we were a little TOO distracted by each other b/c it's been over an hour since we got home. . . thank goodness for living on base and for almost everyone being at work. . . that and the only thing in the car worth stealing is trevor's carseat. . .
anyways, yeah, the rest of the day was pretty routine, just jon unpacking, nothing too exciting. we went to olive garden for dinner (jon wanted to go to this indian place, but i had curry for the last couple nights, so i asked if we could go some other time b/c i wanted something different). . . well, between jet lag, a supposed stomach virus that's wreacked havoc on dh's digestive system for the last week (that's a WHOLE separate post though), and the food he ordered, he ended up feeling really sick and went to bed at 8:30. . . poor jon. . . here's hoping he feels better soon so i can catch up on the bd'ing (even if i CAN'T get pregnant yet. . . boo. . . )
oh, and really quick before i go, here's jon and trevor at dinner tonight--
and this one on the house (and yeah, i painted them both, go me!)--
oh, and i decided to save the dress for a date, so instead i wore the other outfit i posted a week ago (the one that had the white shirt w/ black circles all over it)
i still think i looked FIERCE (to quote stacy and clinton), if i do say so myself! jon was appreciative. . .
so when we got home, we unloaded trevor and jon's suitcases and came in the house.
ok, sidenote for a sec: i cleaned the WHOLE HOUSE yesterday. this is extremely rare, my actually getting off my lazy butt to clean. i don't remember the last time i cleaned, but i know jon helped. . . and he was gone a little over 4 months. ew, gross, i know. ok, i DID mop the floor about a month ago. . . but that's it. so yeah, i was pretty proud of having cleaned everything up and making the house look all pretty and shiny like a mr. clean commercial. the REASON i never clean is only partly b/c i'm lazy (i am, i admit it). . . the bigger reason is that EVERY SINGLE TIME i clean, jon tracks in all kinds of dirt and goo and messes it up. like, it'll rain and he'll have mud on his boots, but refuses to take them off. . . it NEVER happens if it's been a while since i cleaned, just the days that i actually try.
so i figured it's supposed to be nice weather, jon won't be wearing his boots, i'm safe. so what's the FIRST thing that happens when jon walks in the house? the wheel on one of his suitcases BREAKS and he leaves a HUGE BLACK STREAK going down the length of the hallway (gotta love military housing's lovely industrial tile floors). . . i saw it and i was like "you did NOT just do that!" then i made him clean it. . . it took like, 2 seconds w/ a magic eraser, but still. . . of course, now i have this really bright white streak in the midst of slightly-less-white tiles in my hallway, so it seems i didn't do as good a job w/ the cleaning as i'd thought. . .
ok, so i put trevor down for a nap, jon and i *ahem* reacquaint ourselves a bit, and after lunch, we decide to all 3 go on a walk. we leave the house only to find that we left the trunk and 1 of the car doors open. . . good job guys, way to be on the ball. . . yeah, apparently we were a little TOO distracted by each other b/c it's been over an hour since we got home. . . thank goodness for living on base and for almost everyone being at work. . . that and the only thing in the car worth stealing is trevor's carseat. . .
anyways, yeah, the rest of the day was pretty routine, just jon unpacking, nothing too exciting. we went to olive garden for dinner (jon wanted to go to this indian place, but i had curry for the last couple nights, so i asked if we could go some other time b/c i wanted something different). . . well, between jet lag, a supposed stomach virus that's wreacked havoc on dh's digestive system for the last week (that's a WHOLE separate post though), and the food he ordered, he ended up feeling really sick and went to bed at 8:30. . . poor jon. . . here's hoping he feels better soon so i can catch up on the bd'ing (even if i CAN'T get pregnant yet. . . boo. . . )
oh, and really quick before i go, here's jon and trevor at dinner tonight--
Sunday, May 18, 2008
a few thoughts from john glenn
For those of us who have spent time in the military, believe in our military, and support the men and women of our military, read on.
John Glenn (DEMOCRAT) said this - it should make you think a little:
There were 39 combat related killings in Iraq in January 07. In the fair city of Detroit there were 35 murders in the month of January. That's just one American city, about as deadly as the entire war-torn country of Iraq. When some claim that President Bush shouldn't have started this war, state the following:
FDR (DEMOCRAT) led us into World War II. Germany never attacked us, Japan did. From 1941-1945, 450,000 lives were lost. . . an average of 112,500 per year.
Truman (DEMOCRAT) finished that war and started one in Korea. North Korea never attacked us. From 1950-1953, 55,000 lives were lost - an average of 18,334 per year.
John F. Kennedy (DEMOCRAT) started the Vietnam conflict in 1962. Vietnam never attacked us.
Johnson (DEMOCRAT) turned Vietnam into a quagmire. From 1965-1975, 58,000 lives were lost. . . an average of 5,800 per year.
Clinton (DEMOCRAT) went to war in Bosnia without UN or French consent. Bosnia never attacked us. He was offered Osama bin Laden's head on a platter three times by Sudan and did nothing. Osama has attacked us on multiple occasions.
In the years since terrorists attacked us, President Bush has liberated two countries, crushed the Taliban, crippled al-Qaida, put nuclear inspectors in Libya , Iran, and North Korea without firing a shot, and captured a terrorist who slaughtered 300,000 of his own people. And the Democrats are complaining about how long the war is taking.
But Wait, there's more.
It took less time to take Iraq than it took Janet Reno (DEMOCRAT) to take the Branch Davidian compound. That was a 51-day operation.
We've been looking for evidence for chemical weapons in Iraq for less time than it took Hillary Clinton (DEMOCRAT) to find the Rose Law Firm billing records.
It took less time for the 3rd Infantry Division and the Marines to destroy the Medina Republican Guard than it took Ted Kennedy to call the police after his Oldsmobile sank at Chappaquiddick.
It took less time to take Iraq than it took to count the votes in Florida!!!
Our Commander-In-Chief is doing a GREAT JOB! The Military morale is high! The biased media hopes we are too ignorant to realize the facts.
But Wait. There's more!
Some people still don't understand why military personnel do what they do for a living. This exchange between Senators John Glenn and Senator Howard Metzenbaum is worth reading. Not only is it a pretty impressive impromptu speech, but it's also a good example of one man's explanation of why men and women in the armed services do what they do for a living. This is a typical, though sad, example of what some who have never served think of the military.
JOHN GLENN (on the Senate floor - January 26, 2004)
Senator Metzenbaum (speaking to Senator Glenn): 'How can you run for Senate when you've never held a real job?'
Senator Glenn (D-Ohio): 'I served 23 years in the United States Marine Corps. I served through two wars. I flew 149 missions. My plane was hit by anti-aircraft fire on 12 different occasions. I was in the space program. It wasn't my checkbook, Howard; it was my life on the line. It was not a nine-to-five job, where I took time off to take the daily cash receipts to the bank. I ask you to go with me. . . as I went the other day. . . to a veteran's hospital and look those men. . . with their mangled bodies, in the eye, and tell THEM they didn't hold a job! You go with me to the Space Program at NASA and go, as I have gone, to the widows and orphans of Ed White, Gus Grissom and Roger Chaffee. . . and you look those kids in the eye and tell them that their DAD'S didn't hold a job. You go with me on Memorial Day and you stand in Arlington National Cemetery, where I have more friends buried than I'd like to remember, and you watch those waving flags. You stand there, and you think about this nation, and you have the gall to tell ME that those people didn't have a job?'
What about Metzenbaum? For those who don't remember, during W.W.II, Howard Metzenbaum was an attorney representing the Communist Party in the USA. . . now he's a Senator!
If you can read this, thank a teacher. If you are reading it in English thank a Veteran.
John Glenn (DEMOCRAT) said this - it should make you think a little:
There were 39 combat related killings in Iraq in January 07. In the fair city of Detroit there were 35 murders in the month of January. That's just one American city, about as deadly as the entire war-torn country of Iraq. When some claim that President Bush shouldn't have started this war, state the following:
FDR (DEMOCRAT) led us into World War II. Germany never attacked us, Japan did. From 1941-1945, 450,000 lives were lost. . . an average of 112,500 per year.
Truman (DEMOCRAT) finished that war and started one in Korea. North Korea never attacked us. From 1950-1953, 55,000 lives were lost - an average of 18,334 per year.
John F. Kennedy (DEMOCRAT) started the Vietnam conflict in 1962. Vietnam never attacked us.
Johnson (DEMOCRAT) turned Vietnam into a quagmire. From 1965-1975, 58,000 lives were lost. . . an average of 5,800 per year.
Clinton (DEMOCRAT) went to war in Bosnia without UN or French consent. Bosnia never attacked us. He was offered Osama bin Laden's head on a platter three times by Sudan and did nothing. Osama has attacked us on multiple occasions.
In the years since terrorists attacked us, President Bush has liberated two countries, crushed the Taliban, crippled al-Qaida, put nuclear inspectors in Libya , Iran, and North Korea without firing a shot, and captured a terrorist who slaughtered 300,000 of his own people. And the Democrats are complaining about how long the war is taking.
But Wait, there's more.
It took less time to take Iraq than it took Janet Reno (DEMOCRAT) to take the Branch Davidian compound. That was a 51-day operation.
We've been looking for evidence for chemical weapons in Iraq for less time than it took Hillary Clinton (DEMOCRAT) to find the Rose Law Firm billing records.
It took less time for the 3rd Infantry Division and the Marines to destroy the Medina Republican Guard than it took Ted Kennedy to call the police after his Oldsmobile sank at Chappaquiddick.
It took less time to take Iraq than it took to count the votes in Florida!!!
Our Commander-In-Chief is doing a GREAT JOB! The Military morale is high! The biased media hopes we are too ignorant to realize the facts.
But Wait. There's more!
Some people still don't understand why military personnel do what they do for a living. This exchange between Senators John Glenn and Senator Howard Metzenbaum is worth reading. Not only is it a pretty impressive impromptu speech, but it's also a good example of one man's explanation of why men and women in the armed services do what they do for a living. This is a typical, though sad, example of what some who have never served think of the military.
JOHN GLENN (on the Senate floor - January 26, 2004)
Senator Metzenbaum (speaking to Senator Glenn): 'How can you run for Senate when you've never held a real job?'
Senator Glenn (D-Ohio): 'I served 23 years in the United States Marine Corps. I served through two wars. I flew 149 missions. My plane was hit by anti-aircraft fire on 12 different occasions. I was in the space program. It wasn't my checkbook, Howard; it was my life on the line. It was not a nine-to-five job, where I took time off to take the daily cash receipts to the bank. I ask you to go with me. . . as I went the other day. . . to a veteran's hospital and look those men. . . with their mangled bodies, in the eye, and tell THEM they didn't hold a job! You go with me to the Space Program at NASA and go, as I have gone, to the widows and orphans of Ed White, Gus Grissom and Roger Chaffee. . . and you look those kids in the eye and tell them that their DAD'S didn't hold a job. You go with me on Memorial Day and you stand in Arlington National Cemetery, where I have more friends buried than I'd like to remember, and you watch those waving flags. You stand there, and you think about this nation, and you have the gall to tell ME that those people didn't have a job?'
What about Metzenbaum? For those who don't remember, during W.W.II, Howard Metzenbaum was an attorney representing the Communist Party in the USA. . . now he's a Senator!
If you can read this, thank a teacher. If you are reading it in English thank a Veteran.
have a happy period - WTF, are you SERIOUS?!?!?!?!?
This is an actual letter from an Austin woman sent to American company Proctor and Gamble regarding their feminine products. She really gets rolling after the first paragraph. It’s PC Magazine’s 2007 editors’ choice for best webmail-award-winning letter.
Dear Mr. Thatcher,
I have been a loyal user of your ’Always’ maxi pads for over 20 years and I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the LeakGuard Core or Dri-Weave absorbency, I’d probably never go horseback riding or salsa dancing, and I’d certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach in tight, white shorts. But my favorite feature has to be your revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on being the only company smart enough to realize how crucial it is that maxi pads be aerodynamic. I can’t tell you how safe and secure I feel each month knowing there’s a little F-16 in my pants.
Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from ’the curse’? I’m guessing you haven’t. Well, my time of the month is starting right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces violently surging through my body. Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I’ll be transformed into what my husband likes to call ’an inbred hillbilly with knife skills.’ Isn’t the human body amazing?
As Brand Manager in the Feminine-Hygiene Division, you’ve no doubt seen quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customers monthly visits from ’Aunt Flo’. Therefore, you must know about the bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying jags, and out-of-control behavior. You surely realize it’s a tough time for most women. In fact, only last week, my friend Jennifer fought the violent urge to shove her boyfriend’s testicles into a George Foreman Grill just because he told her he thought Grey’s Anatomy was written by drunken chimps. Crazy!
The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is just crawling with homicidal maniacs in Capri pants.... Which brings me to the reason for my letter. Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi-pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: ’Have a Happy Period.’
Are you f***ing kidding me? What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager brain really think happiness - actual smiling, laughing happiness - is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit pleasurable? Well, did it, James? FYI, unless you’re some kind of sick S&M freak girl, there will never be anything ’happy’ about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlua and lock yourself in your house just so you don’t march down to the local Walgreen’s armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory.
For the love of God, pull your head out, man! If you just have to slap a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn’t it make more sense to say something that’s actually pertinent, like ’Put down the Hammer’ or ’Vehicular Manslaughter is Wrong’, or are you just picking on us?
Sir, please inform your Accounting Department that, effective immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss your Flex-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your brand of condescending bull shit. And that’s a promise I will keep. Always.
Best,
Wendi Aarons
Austin
Dear Mr. Thatcher,
I have been a loyal user of your ’Always’ maxi pads for over 20 years and I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the LeakGuard Core or Dri-Weave absorbency, I’d probably never go horseback riding or salsa dancing, and I’d certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach in tight, white shorts. But my favorite feature has to be your revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on being the only company smart enough to realize how crucial it is that maxi pads be aerodynamic. I can’t tell you how safe and secure I feel each month knowing there’s a little F-16 in my pants.
Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from ’the curse’? I’m guessing you haven’t. Well, my time of the month is starting right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces violently surging through my body. Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I’ll be transformed into what my husband likes to call ’an inbred hillbilly with knife skills.’ Isn’t the human body amazing?
As Brand Manager in the Feminine-Hygiene Division, you’ve no doubt seen quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customers monthly visits from ’Aunt Flo’. Therefore, you must know about the bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying jags, and out-of-control behavior. You surely realize it’s a tough time for most women. In fact, only last week, my friend Jennifer fought the violent urge to shove her boyfriend’s testicles into a George Foreman Grill just because he told her he thought Grey’s Anatomy was written by drunken chimps. Crazy!
The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is just crawling with homicidal maniacs in Capri pants.... Which brings me to the reason for my letter. Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi-pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: ’Have a Happy Period.’
Are you f***ing kidding me? What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager brain really think happiness - actual smiling, laughing happiness - is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit pleasurable? Well, did it, James? FYI, unless you’re some kind of sick S&M freak girl, there will never be anything ’happy’ about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlua and lock yourself in your house just so you don’t march down to the local Walgreen’s armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory.
For the love of God, pull your head out, man! If you just have to slap a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn’t it make more sense to say something that’s actually pertinent, like ’Put down the Hammer’ or ’Vehicular Manslaughter is Wrong’, or are you just picking on us?
Sir, please inform your Accounting Department that, effective immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss your Flex-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your brand of condescending bull shit. And that’s a promise I will keep. Always.
Best,
Wendi Aarons
Austin
life comes in 3's
How to play this game. Post these rules on your blog; List 3 joys, 3 fears, 3 goals, 3 current obsessions/collections, 3 random surprising facts about yourself.
3 joys:
1. JON'S COMING HOME!!!!!!!!!2. getting to spend time w/ trevor every day
3. we got a new table that i get to refinish! :)
3 fears:
1. rabies2. throwing up
3. not being a good mom
3 goals:
1. save up enough money to go to hawaii for new years2. go back to school for a masters in athletic training
3. get to the temple regularly
3 current obsessions/collections:
1. twilight series2. the twilight movie coming out this december
3. ballet, of course
3 random facts:
1. i can dislocate my thumbs, hips, and shoulders2. i recently discovered how much fun beading can be - and it doesn't have to look like when you're 5 and make macaroni necklaces
3. my left foot is 1/2 inch longer than my right. . . makes buying shoes interesting. . .
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
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